Kathryn, Chakotay, Tom and B'Elanna had beamed down to an uninhabited planet to explore and assist the official away team in locating fresh food for the ship.  Kathryn was hoping to find suitable specimens of some native flowers to add to the slowly growing collection in airponics. Chakotay was happy just to see Kathryn relaxing a bit while Tom had hoped to lure B'Elanna away for a little time for themselves.  B'Elanna was ignoring his hints to explore because she and Kathryn were in the middle of an animated discussion about the traits necessary for a specimen to be a colorful or scented addition to airponics yet have no negative effects on the major oxygen generating plants.

Chakotay wandered a bit away from the two women and finally settled under a tree with a book he had brought along – just in case. His quiet reading time was interrupted in about ten minutes as Tom gave up luring B'Elanna away from her conversation with Kathryn.

"What you reading?"

Chakotay glanced up to see a clearly disinterested expression on Tom's face.

"War and Peace."

"Interesting?"

"I haven't found out yet. I'm only three hundred sixty pages into it."

"Only?"

"It's a little longer than most novels."

"I guess." Tom wondered what to say next. Chakotay considered letting him stand there until he could think of another topic but decided to save them both the agony.

"Sit down, Tom. And before you ask, yes, it's a beautiful day. Now, do you have anything you really want to talk to me about or are you just out of things to do because B'Elanna is ignoring you?"

Tom sat down about a quarter of the way around the tree. "No offense, Commander, but I really was hoping to have some time with B'Elanna this afternoon."

Chakotay glanced at the two women who were busy with what seemed to be the third flower to catch their attention in as many minutes.

"I know what you mean, but it isn't often the two of them have time to get into technical discussions that aren't life and death decisions."

"I suppose. I just didn't think to plan something for myself."

"You could always ask Joe to beam you down a book."

"I'll pass on that." Tom paused then plunged into what might be forbidden territory. "Is this how you spend all your shore leaves with the captain – reading while she explores?"

"No, but I've found it useful to bring along a book more than once."

Tom was silent for a few minutes then changed the subject.

"How long are you going to wait for her?"

"Until she and B'Elanna are finished examining every plant in the area or it starts getting dark."

"That's not what I meant."

"Then what do you mean?"

"How long are you going to let the captain ignore how you feel before you move on?"

"It's really none of your business, Paris."

"Maybe as a fellow officer it's not, but you're B'Elanna's friend and I'm Kathryn's friend."

"I know you mean well but just let it go. Accept it as our decision."

Tom was not going to accept a brush off so easily. "Is it going to take you two nearly dying like B'Elanna and me to get you to deal with this?"

"We've already been that route a couple of times, so no, I don't think another crisis would change things."

"How can you love her and not want more than you have?"

"How could I love her and ask her to be something she isn't? Tom, what is it you think is missing from what Kathryn and I share?"

"Well, let me think."

Tom was at a loss and Chakotay knew it. "We see each other every day.  We eat most of our meals together, not something you and B'Elanna can claim. We work well together most of the time and we fight and make up. What's missing?"

"Sex for one and all the little things that go along with commitment to each other."

"You're wrong about all those little things. We have most of them – you just don't see them."

"What about the sex? Don't you want to sleep with her?"

"If it were only about sex, we would have been together years ago and probably have drifted apart by now." Chakotay decided to really push home his point. "If you couldn't have sex with B'Elanna, would you move on to another woman?"

Tom opened his mouth to answer then closed it as he considered all the implications of both answers. "I hadn't thought about it quite that way."

"Well, think about it that way." Chakotay's voice was stern but softened as he continued. "Please, Tom. She's happy this way, let it be."

"You're a better man than I am, Charlie Brown."

"Charlie Brown?" Chakotay knew Tom had thrown that in to change the subject and was grateful as Tom carefully started explaining the reference in great detail.

An hour or so later, Chakotay interrupted Tom's continuing explanation.

"They seem to have decided on the specimens they want to take back to Voyager. Let's go check out their choices."

Tom and Chakotay reached the women just as three specimen containers appeared near them.

"I see you two have finally decided which plants to take back to Voyager."

Kathryn and B'Elanna looked up and realized how long they had been and that the sun was starting to sink toward the horizon. B'Elanna seemed distressed.

"Tom, I'm sorry. I…"

It's ok, B, you were having such a good time I didn't want to drag you away." Tom got away with the white lie without a comment from Chakotay who was focused on Kathryn.

"Just which plants have you decided on, Kathryn?"

"These three look promising so we're going to take them back for further analysis. There are a few features we just aren't sure about so we're using the containers to store them until the doctor can check things out for us."  She turned to B'Elanna and Tom. "Are you two ready to beam back to the ship?"

"No." Tom was hoping for a few minutes with B'Elanna.

"Yes." B'Elanna spoke at the same time but paused when she heard Tom's answer.

"I guess we're ready, Captain." Tom decided to humor B'Elanna knowing she would be distracted if she wanted to do something on the ship.

Kathryn and B'Elanna had placed the three containers together for transport to the ship so the four took their places near the containers.

"Janeway to Voyager. Four to beam up with specimen containers."

"Aye, Captain."

As soon as she materialized, Kathryn knew something was wrong just from the look of panic on Ayala's face.

"Transporter room to the bridge."

"Tuvok here. What is the problem?"

"I think you'd better get down here, sir, immediately."

"As you wish. On my way."

Chakotay knew that something was wrong as soon as Ayala called Tuvok. He turned to look at Kathryn and realized what exactly had happened.

"Kathryn?"

She turned to look at him.

"Chakotay, is that you?"

"No, it's me, Tom. Who are you?"

"Me? I'm your wife, Helm Boy."

They all stopped talking. Ayala stepped forward to speak.

"Please wait until Tuvok arrives. Then I think you both, er all, should go to sickbay."

Thirty minutes later, the doctor was still running tests but he had made a few conclusions. Apparently, one of the specimen containers had contained the plant with the symbiogenetic material when Tuvok and Neelix had been merged into Tuvix. They thought all the symbiogenetic material had been removed from the container but it clearly had not. Tuvok had tagged the container for destruction as soon as the doctor was satisfied it was of no further use.

The trace amounts of the material had yielded the same results as before but had only combined the four into two new individuals. A redheaded Kathanna with brow ridges was sitting impatiently on one biobed in an orange uniform trying to identify which traits displayed by Chaktom were from Chakotay and which from Tom. The two men seemed to have merged quite completely in appearance. Rather than a single consciousness that shared memories, both individuals remained separate but shared a body.  With effort, Kathryn could remember everything B'Elanna knew and B'Elanna had access to Kathryn's memories.  They were slowly sorting out how to communicate directly with each other.  The same was true for Tom and Chakotay.

"Well, I've completed my preliminary examination and my original diagnosis stands. The symbiogenetic material has merged the four of you into two bodies in much the same way as Commander Tuvok and Neelix were merged several years ago. Fortunately, we know how to correct the problem. Captain, Lieutenant, I will be ready to separate the two of you tomorrow morning.  I have to run final tests on the radioactive isotopes I will use.

"Commander, Lieutenant, I am still working on the isotopes that will allow your separation. With the captain and Lieutenant Torres, I can use the Klingon genetic markers to separate them just as I used species-specific markers to separate Commander Tuvok and Mr. Neelix. Unfortunately for you, you are the same species and I have to find an isotope that will attach to the DNA of only one of you. You are both the same major blood type so I am searching for other traits that are not shared and which can be tagged accurately."

"Have you considered hair color, doctor?" Kathanna spoke up.

"Hmmm, no I had not. I will add it to the list of possible traits. Now, I want both of you to eat a reasonable meal and get some rest. Captain, Lieutenant, please report back here at 08:00. Commander, Lieutenant, you can report here at 08:30 but not before. I will need that time to check out the captain and lieutenant and will not require your assistance. Do I make myself clear?"

The doctor heard mumbled acknowledgements from Kathanna and Chaktom as they exited sickbay. He shook his head then turned his attention to preparing the radioactive isotopes needed the next day and checking on Ensign Kim's progress in reprogramming the sickbay transporter.

After the door to sickbay closed behind them, Chaktom spoke.

"Do you want to eat in the mess hall?"

"I don't think so."

They took the turbo lift to Deck Three and turned in opposite directions then both came to a dead stop.

"Where are you…?"

"I thought …"

Both spoke at the same time then stopped in unison as they realized that four people were trying to talk at the same time. Chaktom spoke.

"You first, Captain."

"Thank you. Obviously, we can't tell who we're talking to any easier than anyone else can. We'll eat in my quarters. While we're walking, each of us can try to think up a simple way to signal who's speaking."

They made it to the captain's quarters uneventfully until Kathanna almost walked into the door. The women knew immediately that it was the Tom component of Chaktom that snickered but their glare was for both of the men.

"It seems that no one told the computer about our slight change." Kathanna slapped her comm badge. "Janeway to Tuvok."

"Yes, Captain. What can I do for you?"

"You could tell the computer who I am and to let me into my quarters. I imagine the same instructions need to be given for Chakotay, Tom and B'Elanna as well."

"My apologies, Captain. It didn’t occur to me that this would happen. I will remedy the problem immediately." There was a brief pause then Tuvok continued. "You should have access now, Captain. I have also instructed the computer to give you unlimited access to the replicator."

"Thank you, Tuvok. Janeway out."

Kathanna stepped toward the door again and this time it slid aside. She motioned Chaktom to sit down, but he followed her to the replicator. As Kathanna was instructing the replicator to prepare her meal, she started talking to herself.

"Captain, vegetable bouillon might be enough for you, but I'm hungry."

"Same here, Commander. I want more than vegetable soup. Can't we have pizza?"

Kathanna rubbed her hands over her face.

"No, no pizza." She paused as Kathryn tried to search B'Elanna's memories for foods the four could agree on. "How about salad, vegetable lasagna with garlic bread and meatballs on the side and fresh fruit for dessert?"

Kathryn could feel B'Elanna's consent and accepted the double nod of Chaktom as consent from both men. She gave the replicator the appropriate instructions and they carried their own plates to the table. They ate in silence before moving to the couch for coffee before Chaktom started a conversation.

"We still haven't figured out how to signal who is speaking. Obviously, Tom and I know which of us is speaking but I can't tell which of you is speaking most of the time. Is that true for you as well?"

"Yes." They both smiled as they realized that Chaktom couldn't tell whether Kathryn or B'Elanna had answered.

"This might work. If Chakotay and I use people's names then Tom and B'Elanna can use their ranks and at least we will know who is speaking."

"So I have to call my wife 'Lieutenant'?"

"Only for tonight, Tom. We're being separated in the morning."

"It still seems awkward to me, Captain."

"Do you have a better idea, Tom?"

"No, Captain. I guess we can make this work."

"She's right, Tom. This will work and it's not permanent. Kathryn, B'Elanna, can you communicate with each other without talking?"

"Not really, Chak, er Commander. But I can feel, if that's the right word, when the captain changes her mind or makes a decision."

"The same for me, Chakotay. And it seems to be getting easier as we adjust to our current condition. What is really strange is that I can 'remember' what she says just before she actually says it."

"I know what you mean, Kathryn."

"But it's a bit different than the other memories, Captain. I remember your words as something I said. That is very unnerving."

"B'Elanna, how do you feel about all this? And this is me, Tom, not Chakotay, asking."

"I'm scared. I'm really scared."

Chaktom slid closer to Kathanna and pulled her into his arms. "Sorry, Captain, but I need to hold B'Elanna."

Kathryn and Chakotay both allowed Tom and B'Elanna to control their bodies for a while. Tom and B'Elanna talked a few minutes then became silent. Chakotay finally spoke.

"Are you all right, Kathryn?"

"I am now."  Kathryn didn't try to move and they all slowly drifted to sleep.

No alarm woke Kathryn but she was in familiar surroundings.  She glanced at Chaktom and knew that sometime during the night he had awakened and carried her to her bed. Chakotay stirred and Kathryn wondered which of the men was awake.

"Kathryn?"  His voice was a whisper.

"How did you know I was the one who was awake, Chakotay?"

"I'm not sure."  Chaktom was facing the chronometer. "But right now, I think we'd better get up.  You have to be in sickbay in thirty minutes."

Kathryn's immediate response was enough to wake B'Elanna.

"Good morning, Commander."

"How do you know Tom isn't awake?"

"Tom never wakes up until the alarm goes off."

Chaktom and Kathanna both chuckled.  Chaktom rolled over and stood up.

"I'll go to my quarters, Kathryn and B'Elanna, and meet you back here in fifteen minutes. A shower might wake Tom up."

Kathanna was chuckling as Chaktom left and she headed to the shower.

Thirty minutes later, Kathanna stepped through the door to sickbay leaving Chaktom to pace in the corridor outside. Ten minutes later, the doctor called Chaktom to come to sickbay.  He glanced up as Chaktom entered before the link had closed.

"What were you doing, standing in the door?"

"Just outside it.  Now what did you want?" The doctor had no doubt that the first officer was the one speaking.

"The captain and lieutenant are fine.  I've given them a sedative so they will sleep for a few hours while their bodies readjust.  Now if you will step into my office, I'll update you on my progress with your treatment."

The doctor walked into his office expecting Chaktom to follow but Chaktom moved over to the biobeds where Kathryn and B'Elanna were sleeping. Chaktom gently stroked B'Elanna's face then repeated the gesture with Kathryn without a word before following the doctor to his office.

"Please sit down, Commander, Lieutenant."  Chaktom sat.  "Thank you. The captain was correct yesterday, hair color is one trait you share no gene sequences in common. However, I am having difficulty preparing a radioactive isotope that will tag the gene sequence in only one of you."

"What exactly does that mean, Doctor?"

"It means that it's going to take me longer than I expected to find the correct isotope."

"Are you certain you will find one?"

"No.  There is the possibility that I will be unable to prepare an isotope that will accomplish my objective.  I wanted you to be aware of that."

"Did you tell the captain yet?"

"No. Time enough for that when she wakes up and is ready to resume her duties.  I have however informed Commander Tuvok of the situation. I suggest you return to your quarters until the captain and lieutenant wake up."

Chaktom opened his mouth to speak but realized there was nothing to be said so he stood and exited sickbay. He hesitated a minute in the corridor as he debated which quarters to use before deciding that the mess hall was more inviting.

Kathryn woke up in sickbay and did a mental inventory of her physical condition.  Still uncertain, she briefly touched her forehead. She certainly felt like her old self. She sat up on one elbow and looked around sickbay. B'Elanna was starting to move.

"B'Elanna? Are you all right?"

B'Elanna went through the same mental inventory before she answered.

"I think so. Just a little disoriented."

"I know what you mean."

"Ladies, both of you may lie back down until I tell you to get up." The doctor hadn't lost his bedside manner. He was rewarded by a glare and a low growl. Knowing that taking his time was enough of a response, he fiddled with his tricorder and scanned and rescanned even though he knew both women were fine though slightly disoriented.

"You're both fine but are probably feeling a slight disorientation. That will pass. I will release you to your quarters until lunch. After you have eaten, please report back to me for a final check up – unless you prefer to remain here until this afternoon."

"How are Chakotay and Tom?"

"I don't discuss patients with other patients, Captain. If they wish to share that information with you, they may but I will not."

"I'm the captain and I need to know the condition of two of my senior officers."

"Right now you are a patient and need to rest. Now, are you resting here or in your quarters?"

"Where are they?"

"I told them to go to their quarters but I doubt that they took my advice. No one around here takes my advice."

"Come on, Captain, we can contact them from our quarters."

"Him, Lieutenant, you can contact 'him'." The doctor was not going to pretend he wasn't present even if they were ignoring him.

"All right, B'Elanna. We'll go to my quarters and let the computer find them for us."

"Captain, why hasn't the doctor separated Tom and Chakotay yet?"

"I don't know, B'Elanna, but I don't like the way he refused to discuss them with us." They reached the door and again the computer refused to allow Kathryn to enter her own quarters. "Janeway to Tuvok."

"Yes, Captain."

"Would you please tell the computer to admit me to my quarters."

"My apologies, Captain. The doctor failed to report your successful return to your former self. You should have access now."

"Well, please advise the doctor to keep you better informed. Can you tell me where Chakotay and Tom are?"

"Yes, Captain. They are in the mess hall."

"Please ask them to come to my quarters. Janeway out."

"Aye, Captain."

Kathryn stepped toward her door again and this time was admitted. She headed for the replicator.

"Sit down, B'Elanna. Can I get you something?"

"Iced tea, please."

Kathryn sat on the couch after handing B'Elanna her tea. She took a long sip of her coffee.

"Now, where were we?"

"Discussing what the doctor didn't tell us. I wonder what the problem is."

"Last night he said he was having trouble isolating unique genetic strings to use to separate them. Maybe he can't find one."

"There must be thousands of differences in their DNA, Captain."

"Maybe they have to be a certain length in order to be tagged."

"Or maybe the tag is the problem. He might be having trouble getting an isotope to tag only the targeted sequence."

"That's probably the problem, B'Elanna. It's quite possible that although the sequence is unique, the tag is attaching to others as well."

"I don't like the implications."

"I don't either."

The chime interrupted the two women.

"Enter."

Chaktom came through the door and paused.

"Help yourself to something from the replicator and join us."

Chaktom shook his head. "No thanks. We've been in the mess hall for the last couple of hours worrying about you two. How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, Tom."

"I'm fine, Chakotay. Now, please remember we can't tell whose talking, all right?"

"Sorry, Captain."

"No problem, Tom. Now tell us exactly what the doctor told you. He refused to discuss your condition with me."

The small group spent the next several hours reviewing the doctor's report and prognosis. Kathryn and B'Elanna both found it hard to deal with the delays which both declared completely unacceptable. They even downloaded all the doctor's working files so they could study his procedures since they were sure he had missed something. It was with great reluctance that they conceded that he had missed nothing and that his conclusions were correct. Chaktom finally convinced Kathryn and B'Elanna to leave the doctor to his work and eat some dinner. After they ate, they all moved to the couch and tried to relax.

Chaktom sat nervously between Kathryn and B'Elanna trying to decide how to treat the two women. Chakotay and Tom both realized that communications between them were becoming increasingly easier. There was no hiding the fact from the other that both wanted to comfort one of the women but both were unsure of the reaction to any physical contact though for very different reasons. Chakotay finally convinced Tom to put his arm around B'Elanna. She stiffened slightly then relaxed and leaned against him.

"I guess it doesn't matter which of you is holding me right now. Thank you."

"It's me, B'Elanna."

"Tom, I'm still scared. I thought the doctor would just need a few extra hours to separate the two of you."

"I know, B. Just give him some more time. He'll figure something out."

"Well, time is a luxury he will lose tomorrow." Kathryn spoke more from anger than from conviction.

"Look, you know you can't rush him. If he takes any shortcuts to move things along, he could miss something that will work or make a mistake that would make matters worse." No one had any doubt that Chakotay was the speaker.

"How could they be worse?"

"He could kill them, Captain." B'Elanna's voice was a whisper as she finally voiced her greatest fear.

Chaktom pulled B'Elanna closer as he answered. "That won't happen, B. The doctor won't take any chances with our lives."

B'Elanna looked at Kathryn remembering that she had been the one to perform the procedure on Tuvix when the doctor had refused. Kathryn knew B'Elanna was wondering whether her insistence on speed would prompt her to move too quickly and end in disaster. Kathryn looked at Chaktom searching for more confidence from him but failed to find the reassurance she sought.

"I wouldn't risk their lives, B'Elanna. You must know that."

"I know you wouldn't knowingly risk them but please don't push the doctor to rush."

"All right, B'Elanna, but I'm not letting him dally around either."

"Thank you, Captain." B'Elanna sighed and sat up straighter. "It's getting late and I'm tired. I'd better be going now."

B'Elanna stood to leave and Chaktom stood to go with her.

"You don't have to leave because of me."

"I'm going with you, B'Elanna." Tom was the speaker again.

B'Elanna hesitated and Chaktom could see the confusion and pain on her face.

"Why?"

"You're my wife. I'm going home with you."

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why?"

"Well, Tom might be my husband but you're also partly Chakotay and he's not. I don't think I could sleep with you in the same bed."

B'Elanna watched fascinated as different expressions chased across Chaktom's face and she knew a heated conversation was being carried out behind those eyes. Finally, his face settled into an expression of disappointed acceptance.

"You're right, B'Elanna. We'll use Chakotay's quarters for now. I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you, too." B'Elanna turned to Kathryn. "Thank you, Captain. I'll see you in the morning."

"Good night, B'Elanna."

Chaktom turned to Kathryn. "I'd better be going, too."

"You trust me with your life, don't you, Chakotay?"

"Of course. I'm sure B'Elanna trusts you with her life, too. It's Tom she's worried about though. Can you understand the difference?"

"I think so." Kathryn shivered but not from the cold. "I'm just as scared as she is."

"I know. It will be all right. Just give the doctor time to find the solution."

Chaktom reached out to touch Kathryn's cheek then left. Long after he left, Kathryn considered the alternatives if the doctor were unsuccessful. None of them were good.

The next day brought no new developments despite Kathryn's frequent visits to check on the doctor's progress. The procedure that had worked so easily for Tuvix and Kathanna remained beyond reach for Chaktom. The doctor refused to concede that it could not be accomplished, an attitude endorsed by Kathryn.

Kathryn noticed late that afternoon that the internal communications seemed to be improving between Chakotay and Tom to the extent that there was no longer any visible sign when they were debating and action. She wasn't too concerned until B'Elanna mentioned that she had noticed that Chakotay and Tom seemed to be thinking more and more alike. Finally, she confronted Chaktom when he called her 'Kathryn' and it was clearly Tom who was part of the conversation.

"Do you still feel like two separate people?"

"Yes. At least I think so."

"And which of you just answered me?"

"We both did."

"You used the word "I" instead of 'we'."

Chaktom grew quite serious as he considered the question again. "I'm not sure. When you ask one of us specifically about something, that person answers but when we're just talking it feels more like we're both talking."

"I want you to go to sickbay and have the doctor check you out.  Tell him what you just told me. I'll be down in twenty minutes to hear his report."

"I don't think that's necessary."

"Don't force me make it an order."

"All right. I need to check on the doctor's progress anyway."

The doctor's report was not promising. It seemed that not only were the consciousnesses of the two men slowly merging, but also everything that made each of them unique was starting to blur. It was his opinion that in a matter of days, it would become impossible to separate them even if he could identify the correct isotope. Chaktom had taken the news without speaking then left to return to his quarters. After telling the doctor to keep this latest development to himself, Kathryn went to find B'Elanna in engineering.

"I need to speak with you, B'Elanna."

"I'm in the middle of this. Can it wait?"

"No. Get Joe to finish for you." Kathryn's quiet response was more than enough to alert B'Elanna. She quickly turned the work over to Joe and led the way to her office.

"What is it? Has something happened?"

"They're fine for now, B'Elanna."

"For now?"

"It seems that their consciousnesses are slowing merging meaning they are becoming more like Tuvix."

"What else?" B'Elanna knew that if that were the only development, Kathryn would have waited until her shift was over to update her.

"It seems that they are merging more completely on all levels than happened with either Tuvix or Kathanna. The doctor thinks that in a matter of days that it will become impossible to separate them."

"I should have known." B'Elanna shook her head in despair. "I finally let someone into my life and now I'm going to lose him."

"You haven't lost him yet and the doctor hasn't given up either."

"What are we going to do if they decide they don't want to be separated?"

"You won't have to do anything, B'Elanna. That will be my problem. I just hope the doctor finds a solution before it gets to that point."

A week later, Kathryn sat in her ready room trying to decide how soon to tell the doctor to stop looking for an isotope. Chaktom was now a unique personality and admitted to both Kathryn and B'Elanna that while he could remember everything Chakotay and Tom knew, he was neither of them. The doctor's report on Chaktom's condition from the afternoon before was not encouraging. She wished her biggest problem was whether to make Chaktom her first officer or helmsman but she knew it wasn't. For a few minutes, she allowed herself the luxury of grieving her loss as she remembered times spent with Chakotay and Tom over the years.

Kathryn was pulled back to the present by a hail. "Doctor to Captain Janeway.  Please report to sickbay."

"What is it, Doctor?"

"I prefer to explain in my office, Captain."

"On my way, Doctor."

Kathryn entered sickbay and went straight to the doctor's office.

"What is so important that you had to call me down here, Doctor?"

"I've found the isotope." The doctor paused before he continued. "But it's not as specific in identifying the correct DNA sequences as I would like it to be."

"How far below your standards is it?"

"It's about 80% accurate from the few tests I could run using it. The test results I used for you and B'Elanna were 98.7%.

"That is quite a difference. If it's not acceptable, why did you even bother reporting this to me?"

"I have no reason to think I will be able to find a more accurate isotope – especially not within the time limit that exists. My latest scan of Chaktom shows that if we delay more than 48 hours, there is no need to continue the search. As it is, the degree of merger is going to cause the accuracy of this isotope to drop about 5% for every six hours that passes.  It is my professional opinion that if we are to succeed we need to proceed immediately."

"What exactly happens if the isotope is only 80% accurate?"

With 80% accuracy, the two men will survive and retain their own memories but will also most likely retain at least some of the memories of the other. There is a remote possibility that each could lose a relatively small portion of their own memories. I do not consider that a significant factor however. The greater risk is that if some sequences are removed completely to one or the other, at least one of them could die. Even with 80% accuracy, both are likely to have trace amounts of the other's DNA."

"How would that affect them?"

"It all depends on which strands get misplaced. It could be as harmless as Tom having black hair and Chakotay having blue eyes. It could be serious enough to result in crippling disabilities or one of them being female and the other carrying two Y-chromosomes. There is no way to predict the outcome."

"It sounds too dangerous to risk."

"That's why I asked you down here. Do I keep looking or do I present this option to Chaktom?"

Kathryn sighed. Was this her decision or Chaktom's? How she wished they had never set foot on that planet with the symbiogenetic plant!

"I'll be honest, Doctor. Based on your report from yesterday, I was debating whether to tell you to stop searching after today. From what you've just told me, that decision stands. You may stop your research for an appropriate isotope. I'm not prepared to make this decision just yet. I want you to present this option to Chaktom but I want you to make it clear that I haven't approved the procedure yet."

"If you have time now, Captain, I can ask him to join us and we can proceed."

"All right, Doctor, but we'll do this in my ready room. Please ask Chaktom whether he wants B'Elanna to join us there as well. I'll expect you all in fifteen minutes."

"Aye, Captain. Fifteen minutes."

An hour later, Chaktom and B'Elanna had heard the doctor's report and asked questions, received answers and discussed the entire issue in great depth. Kathryn had spent most of the time listening to what Chaktom and B'Elanna were saying – and what they weren't saying.  When she thought they had started to revisit the same issues for the third time, she took control of the meeting.

"I think we've covered all the information the doctor has available. As the doctor mentioned when we began, I have not yet decided whether I will allow this procedure. Before I make my decision, I wanted your input, Chaktom."

"I'm not sure what I want to do. A week ago, I would have said to take the risk but I'm not sure about it now. I need to think about this."

"Might I remind you that the longer we delay, the greater the risks? If we delay more than twelve hours, I'm not sure I can perform the procedure."

"I need to think. Captain, with your permission I'll return to my quarters to consider this. I'll be back in an hour to let you know whether I even want to proceed. I take it that if I say no, you will not encourage either the doctor or me to proceed?"

"That's correct, Chaktom. I'll see you in an hour."

Chaktom and the doctor left but B'Elanna remained seated.

"Was there something else?"

"Please don't deny them permission to proceed, Captain."

"I'm not sure it's worth the risk, B'Elanna."

"I want Tom back. I know it's selfish, but I miss him."

"Oh, B'Elanna, Tom's not gone. He's part of Chaktom."

"Chaktom knows everything Tom knew but he isn't Tom any more than he's Chakotay. He won't even look me in the eye anymore much less stay in a room alone with me."

"Are you sure it isn't because you're so uncomfortable with him?"

"I'm sure that's part of it, but it's also because he's uncomfortable with me, too. Tom and Chakotay have blended into someone I don't know."

"You want me to risk one person's life?"

"I just want you to let him decide. Please?" B'Elanna hesitated before adding a final plea. "Please, Captain, don't stop him because you want Chakotay back as badly as I want Tom back. Don't stop him because you're afraid you're being selfish."

"What do you mean?"

"I know how you feel about Chakotay, remember? And I know how hard you struggle not to let your feelings affect your decisions on Voyager. All I'm asking is that you don't allow guilt for having those feelings affect your decision either."

B'Elanna left when Kathryn made no comment. She hoped what she had said was enough.

Kathryn was staring out the view port at the stars when her chime sounded. She knew that the hour was up and that Chaktom had returned.

"Enter."

Chaktom entered and walked over to the couch but didn't approach too closely.

"I've considered everything the doctor told me. The risks are high. I have also considered what I feel and what I remember Tom and Chakotay felt. I believe the chances of success are high enough to make this a risk I'm willing to take."

"What made you decide that?"

"Does it matter?"

"I think it does – for me. I still have to give the doctor permission to proceed. I'd like to know your reasons."

"One reason is that this crew is better off with both Chakotay and Tom. They are two of your senior officers and either would be hard to replace." Kathryn started to speak but Chaktom stopped her. "Wait, let me finish. There are other reasons as well, of a more personal nature. Are you sure you want to hear them?"

"I'm sure." Kathryn's voice sounded less certain than her words.

"As I am, I'm confused about many things. Tom and Chakotay both loved B'Elanna but in very different ways. Those ways have not blended well for me. That is but one example." Chaktom stepped closer and turned Kathryn so he could look into her eyes.

"Tell me what you see when you look at me, Kathryn. Tell me what you feel. Can you honestly say that I can fill the role on this ship that Chakotay filled? Or that Tom filled?"

Kathryn was silent. She finally raised her eyes to meet his. "I can't lie to you. I think in time you can do the jobs Chakotay and Tom did but no, I don't think you can fill their roles on Voyager."

"That's what I thought. I don't have a place here."

"You could die. I'm not sure I should allow you to take the risk."

"Or Tom and Chakotay could live. Don't you want them back? Don't you want Chakotay back?"

"What I want isn't at issue. It's what you want and whether I think the chances of success are worth the risks."

"What you want is at issue, Kathryn. But do you want Chakotay back? Or do you want him back so badly you have to prove to yourself that you're impartial by stopping me from going ahead with this procedure?"

Kathryn was silent again.

"That's what I thought, Kathryn. Well, I'll tell you I think it's worth the risk and I'll tell you why. Tom loved B'Elanna and Chakotay loved you. I remember those feelings and I've lost them. I want them back. If nothing else, Tom and B'Elanna will be happy again."

"What if you die?"

"Then you and B'Elanna and the rest of the crew can grieve and get on with your lives. If I stay, you'll have lost both Tom and Chakotay but won't be able to grieve because I'm here. Even my death is better for everyone. Now, I'm going to sickbay to tell the doctor my decision. Are you going to stop me?"

"No. I'll inform the doctor that he has my permission provided the two of you are in agreement."

"I'm going to talk to B'Elanna before we proceed. I want to explain this to her." Chaktom started to leave. "Will you come down to sickbay with me?"

Kathryn nodded and moved to catch up with Chaktom. She was glad he had forced her to come along.

An hour later, Kathryn and B'Elanna were pacing around sickbay as the doctor checked monitors. The procedure had been carried out and the doctor was satisfied that physically the two men were fine – or would be once they had recovered from the stress of the procedure. Both were still sedated and unconscious. Only when they awakened would they know if the procedure had successfully separated their personalities, emotions and memories. The waiting was not easy for either woman. Finally the doctor spoke.

"Ladies, if you won't leave, then go sit down in my office and wait. It is very irritating to watch you pacing like that."

Kathryn and B'Elanna reluctantly did as they had been instructed. They sat for a few minutes before B'Elanna spoke.

"What are you going to do now, Captain?"

"About what?"

"Your feelings for Chakotay. You almost lost him. I know how nearly losing Tom made me feel so I'm sure this has been just as difficult for you. Isn't it time you stopped pretending you don't love him?"

"I can't. What if I have to…"

"What if this happens again and he dies? Then what? He would never know you loved him as much as he loved you. Is that what you want?"

"What I want doesn't matter."

"You want him and he does matter. Denying your feelings doesn't change them."

"We don't even know if we truly have Tom and Chakotay back yet."

"Maybe you don't love him after all. Maybe you fooled me. I came away from this whole thing determined to live my life and enjoy it and to make the most of my time with Tom. Maybe you and I are too different for me to understand you."

"We aren't so different, B'Elanna. I didn't fool you but I don't know that I can change my decision."

"Try, Captain. He's a good man and you both deserve to be happy."

"I know he does, B'Elanna."

"I said 'both of you' and I meant both of you."

The women were silent for a few minutes then Kathryn stood.

"I'll be on the bridge. Maybe if it's just you waiting, the doctor will wake them sooner. Make sure he calls me when he does."

"I will, Captain."

An hour later, Kathryn was waiting for word in her ready room. It had been boringly quiet all during the shift and she had not been able to get B'Elanna's words out of her mind.

"Doctor to Captain Janeway."

"Janeway here. Are they awake?"

"They are, Captain.  I have just released both Lieutenant Paris and Commander Chakotay to their quarters."

"I told you to let me know as soon as they were awake."

"Commander Chakotay insisted I not do that. Take it up with him, Captain. Doctor out."

Muttering under her breath about holograms and execs who couldn't follow orders, Kathryn left her ready room and headed for Chakotay's quarters. Only as she approached his door did she realize that she had no idea what she wanted to say to him. It didn't matter – she had to see for herself that he really was all right. She signaled for admission and hoped he was ready to see her.

The door opened almost immediately and Kathryn stepped through. At first, she didn't see Chakotay because he had dimmed the lights. She finally made out his form lying on the couch with his arm over his eyes.

"Are you all right?"

"Hi, Kathryn. Yes, I'm fine. It's just a headache. The doctor says it's part of the adjustment process but he won't give me anything for it."

"That's barbaric!"

"No. The pain has no physical source so there isn't anything that would help. If it makes you feel better, Tom has one, too."

Kathryn walked over to the couch.

"Here, lift up your head for a second."

Chakotay complied and Kathryn sat down then pulled his head onto her lap.

"Maybe this will help."

For fifteen minutes, Kathryn gently massaged Chakotay's temples. When she finally realized that he had fallen asleep, she stopped. Rather than risk waking him, Kathryn remained where she was.

The next thing she heard was Chakotay's voice.

"Kathryn?"

"What?" Kathryn roused from sleep and flexed her neck. "I'm sorry. I fell asleep."

"Hey, so did I. My headache is gone."

"That's good. I'm glad I could help."

Neither commented on why Chakotay had not moved away from Kathryn. They sat in silence for a few minutes before Chakotay spoke.

"Why did you come, Kathryn?"

"To make sure you were really you. How do you feel?"

"I'm not sure. I doubt I'd notice the difference if I had much of Tom lurking in the corners of my mind. We got used to each other during the last few days. I can tell you this though. I don't have any of Tom's emotions although I seem to know a few unfamiliar maneuvers for the Delta Flyer that aren't on the approved list and if the doctor is to be believed, my hair is going to have a reddish cast to it in the light instead of blue from now on."

Kathryn looked down to meet his eyes.

"Well, your eyes are the same. What happened to your tattoo?"

"It wasn't genetic and the procedure didn’t retain anything like that. The doctor said he would be happy to restore it tomorrow after I've had a good night's sleep."

Kathryn stroked his temple where the tattoo should have been.

"I'm glad he's willing to oblige. I've gotten used to it. You look naked without it."

"Love me, love my tattoo?"

Chakotay stopped talking abruptly. He had spoken without thinking and wasn't sure how Kathryn would react. Kathryn knew he thought he had crossed some invisible line. She also knew that she would never get a better opportunity. Her hand stilled briefly then traced the lines that were no longer visible except in her mind.

"Yes, I guess it is love you, love your tattoo... for me anyway."

Chakotay gingerly sat up mindful that his headache could return. "Is that sentiment something between the two of us only?"

"No. It's for us tonight and in a few days or weeks it's something I'll be ready to share with the crew."

Kathryn turned to face Chakotay and met his lips halfway in a gentle kiss that slowly turned passionate. Chakotay reluctantly pulled away.

"I don't think I'm up to more tonight, Kathryn. That headache is starting to come back."

Kathryn glanced around the room.

"Well, it seems like Chaktom had more of Tom's housekeeping habits than yours. Come have dinner with me and I'll rub your head if the headache comes back."

Chakotay stood and they headed for the door.

"Will you fix me a pepperoni pizza?"

Kathryn's face was worth any retribution and Chakotay chuckled. Kathryn looked at him and started laughing, too.

"You'd better be joking."

"I am, but the look on your face was priceless." Chakotay face turned serious. "Really, Kathryn, there is very little of Tom in me. The doctor was quite thorough in his physical and psychological exams."

Kathryn still looked unconvinced so he pulled her into a hug.

"Now, does that feel like Tom?"

"If I say yes, can I stay here longer?"

"No. You promised me dinner and I'm hungry."

"You're making this really easy for me, Chakotay."

"There's no reason to make it difficult. I love you and I knew when you couldn't answer my question in your ready room that you loved me."

"I do love you, but have I ever told you I also really like you?"

"No."

"Well, I do."

"I like you, too, Kathryn."

Chakotay leaned down and gave Kathryn a quick kiss as Kathryn stroked his hair.

"I like doing that as well."

"I think I'm going to like red highlights in your hair, Chakotay. Just remember that red is your color from now on, not blond."