by Dakota

Kathryn heard a door whisper closed behind someone going through the door to sickbay. From where she lay, she could not see who had entered or left. No voice spoke and the doctor did not appear so she decided someone had left. A few minutes later, her conclusion was confirmed as the doctor appeared.

"Ah, I see you're awake." The doctor had his scanner out and was waving it over Kathryn as he spoke.  He made noncommittal noises as various results flashed on the screen.

"Well?"

"Well what, Captain?"

"When can I leave?"

"Interesting. Commander Chakotay was asking the same thing earlier as was Lieutenant Paris about Lieutenant Torres. I'm surprised you didn't hear Lieutenant Torres asking as well. I was sure they heard her all the way down in Engineering. Commander Tuvok on the other hand has not made such an inquiry. He has however asked about his progress in recovering from the effects of being assimilated. We have had some interesting discussions on the similarities and differences between the suppression of emotions normally felt by Borg drones and the methods used by Vulcans. He mentioned that it was quite refreshing to have the support of the Borg controls to assist him in controlling his emotions during your little adventure."

"Doctor, I'm sure that's all very interesting, but it doesn't answer my question."

"Oh. I'll tell you the same thing I told Commander Chakotay. If you eat a proper lunch, I may consider releasing you later this afternoon to your quarters."

"If I am fit enough to leave this afternoon, I'm fit enough to leave now." Kathryn matched her actions to her words and started to sit up. The doctor stopped her.

"I said 'if' and 'may consider'. If you insist on this type of behavior, I will keep you in here until you are completely recovered which could be another five or six days at a minimum." The doctor paused to give Kathryn time to consider his words. "Now, do I have to turn on the restraints to keep you here?"

"No. I'll wait until this afternoon." Kathryn glared at the doctor but he seemed impervious to its intensity.

Kathryn managed to eat enough of her lunch to satisfy the doctor that she would follow his instructions for the next few days if he released her from sickbay. Kathryn watched the chronometer in sickbay all afternoon. More than a dozen times, she considered calling Engineering to check its display, certain that it must be wrong. Three hours had never taken so long to pass. About 16:00, Chakotay entered sickbay and went directly to the doctor's office. He was in there more than twenty minutes talking with the doctor. Try as she would, Kathryn could not make out more than a word or two of their conversation.

Finally, they both left the doctor's office and approached her. Chakotay stood back as the doctor conducted another brief check of Kathryn. He seemed satisfied.

"All right, Captain. So long as you follow my instructions, I will release you to your quarters to complete your recovery. I have sent full instructions and limitations to your quarters. I have also restricted your replicator to specific foods and limited the quantity of caffeine you may ingest within a twenty-four hour period. I expect to see you in the morning between 08:00 and 10:00 hours and again in the evening between 18:00 hours and 20:00 hours each and every day until I release you to active duty. Compliance with my instructions will result in your return to duty in the least amount of time. Failure to do so will extend the time significantly."

Kathryn had sat up while the doctor spoke. She considered protesting the frequent visits but reconsidered when she heard his last statement. The doctor opened a storage locker and removed several items of clothing.

"I believe these will suffice to get you to your quarters.  You may return them this evening when you come for your regular checkup."

Kathryn quickly moved to the changing room and dressed. She was surprised to see Chakotay still standing and chatting with the doctor when she had finished.

"I'll see you later, Doctor." Kathryn started to move past the doctor and Chakotay but was halted by the doctor's voice.

"Captain, I think you are forgetting something."

"What? You said I was released to my quarters. That's where I'm going."

"The Commander is escorting you there." Kathryn started to protest but the doctor continued as if she hadn't spoken. "It's all explained in my instructions that you can read when you reach your quarters. That is, unless you'd rather remain here in sickbay?"

Kathryn didn't speak but she tilted her head toward the door indicating that Chakotay should come with her. He complied, trying to keep his smile from turning into a grin as she yielded to the doctor's instructions with as much grace as she could muster. He fell into step beside her as she moved down the hall toward the turbolift.

"What exactly are in his instructions that required you to escort me to my quarters?"

"Are you sure you want to know right now?"

"It's as good a time as any."

"He wants you to stay in your quarters unless I or someone I've designated is with you."

"You mean I'm not allowed to walk around my own ship without a babysitter?"

"It's only for a few days. I tried to talk him out of it, but he's concerned about the after effects of being assimilated. He's agreed that you can have all the privacy you want in your quarters – or as many visitors as you want. In fact, he'd rather you had a lot of visitors."

"Why?"

"To help you adjust to leaving the collective."

"How is that supposed to help?" Kathryn's question was asked over her shoulder as they exited the turbolift and headed down the corridor toward her quarters.

"You were used to being in constant communication with the collective except when you were regenerating. You were also in constant communication with Unimatrix Zero while you were regenerating. You may not have been truly part of the collective but you still shared thoughts with millions of drones. Now you are alone again."

"So far I am enjoying the quiet."  Kathryn stopped as she reached her quarters and turned as if expecting Chakotay to leave. "And I will enjoy a quiet evening."

"Aren't you forgetting your appointment to see the doctor later this evening?" Kathryn's face answered Chakotay's question. "Look, you're tired. Go rest for an hour. I'll be back at 17:30 hours and we can go to dinner in the mess hall. We can stop at sickbay before you come back here. Sound ok?"

"Yes." Kathryn sighed, whether in relief or frustration or from weariness, Chakotay couldn't tell. He reached out to touch her cheek. He was rewarded by a slight smile. As Kathryn turned to enter her quarters, he spoke.

"Kathryn, the doctor insisted on some assurance that you would follow all of his instructions. If you leave your quarters without me or my authorization, you'll trigger a security alert. He wanted guards but I convinced him this would be sufficient. I'm sorry. I'll try again tomorrow to get him to agree to remove that alarm. It's only for a few days."

Kathryn looked up at Chakotay. That was the moment she realized how much being assimilated had affected her. She could no longer read the emotions on his face or in his eyes. The fear must have shown on her face.

"It will be all right, Kathryn. Now, get some rest. I'll be back before you know it."

Kathryn simply nodded and entered her quarters. Chakotay stood and watched until the door closed behind her. Something other than his words had frightened her but he couldn’t figure out what it could have been.

As Kathryn walked across the living area, she saw the message light flashing on her monitor. Knowing it would be the doctor's excessively wordy list of rules, requirements and prohibitions, she ignored it and went to her bedroom. She pulled back the covers and curled up against her pillow. Within minutes, she was in a dreamless sleep.

It seemed only a few minutes before a soft voice called her name.

"Kathryn. Come on, Kathryn. It's time to wake up."

Kathryn roused from a deep sleep, slightly uncertain where she was. "Chakotay?"

"That's right, Kathryn. It's time to go to dinner."

"Already? I just lay down a few minutes ago."

"That was almost two hours, not a few minutes."

"I didn't realize I was so tired."

"Probably a side effect of all the treatments the doctor has given you the last few days. Tomorrow will be better. Now, it's time for dinner."

Kathryn stood and headed for the bathroom. "Give me a few minutes."

"I'll be in the other room."

Kathryn entered her living area a few minutes later to find Chakotay waiting patiently near the door. She smiled weakly and was rewarded by a gentle smile. Again, she realized that she couldn't read the emotions on his face. Her fears returned briefly, but faded as they talked.

"I'm sorry I was late to pick you up for dinner. I got tied up in Engineering."

"Really?"

"Yes. A few of the people down there are not used to Joe's calm approach and are not responding well until he's angry enough to toss them out an airlock. They all miss B'Elanna. I'm not sure who is more surprised by that – the people in engineering or me."

"Is my bridge fairing any better than Engineering?"

"Your bridge if fine, Kathryn, but they miss you, too. I miss you." Chakotay's voice was soft and Kathryn knew she was missing some of his meaning but had no idea what. Chakotay read her confusion easily. "What's wrong, Kathryn? That's the second time you've looked scared because of something I've said. Are you afraid of me?"

"No, it's nothing like that." Kathryn's voice seemed slightly panicked. "Look, do we have to eat in the mess hall? I think I'd rather eat here if that's permitted."

"Sure. I'll go get us something to eat and be back in a few minutes."

"Can't we use the replicator?"

"We really shouldn't. We're a bit low on energy reserves until they finish repairs." Chakotay realized that something was bothering Kathryn. "Look, we have to go to sickbay anyway. Let's go there and see the doctor and then stop and get our dinner on the way back here. That sound all right?"

"Yes. Thank you. That does sound better tonight."

Fifteen minutes later, they were carrying their dinner back to Kathryn's quarters while Chakotay updated Kathryn on the latest ship's gossip. By the time they had finished eating, their talk had turned to the status of the ship but Chakotay kept the information general. Kathryn seemed content with what he told her. When Kathryn yawned for the second time, Chakotay knew it was time to end the evening.

"I'd better be going. You're still tired. I'll pick you up for breakfast at 07:45 hours."

"You're right, I am tired."

"If you need anything, just call me. Don't worry about waking me."

Chakotay arrived the next morning to find Kathryn ready and waiting for him. She was glad to see him but seemed reluctant to go to the mess hall for breakfast.

"Sleep well?"

"Yes. Funny, after all the doctor's concerns, I thought I'd dream, but I didn't. Why don't I just go to see him instead of bothering with breakfast? He probably will release me from most of those restrictions once he knows he was over-anxious."

"You really think the doctor is going to release you on the basis of one night's sleep? You know him better than that – he will expect you to follow each of his little requirements until he changes them. If you skip breakfast he might want to confine you to sickbay."

"He wouldn't do that."

"You willing to take the chance?"

"All right, Chakotay. Let's go eat breakfast. You can tell me how my ship is doing while we eat."

They made their way to the mess hall where they talked about the ship and crew. Eventually Chakotay realized that Kathryn was trying to stall going to see the doctor.

"Kathryn, why don't we just get it over with, then you can enjoy the rest of the day."

"Get what over with?"

"Seeing the doctor this morning. Besides, I thought you were convinced he would lighten up on your restrictions."

"I know what I said, but I've been thinking about what you said and he's more likely to add restrictions."

"Unless I think it's in your best interest, I won't support him." Kathryn still looked reluctant. "I'll let you spend the morning in your ready room if you get a clear report from the doctor."

Kathryn's face brightened immediately as she glanced at Chakotay to see if he was teasing. Just as quickly as the slight smile appeared, it faded. "What's wrong, Kathryn? That's the third time you've looked like that when I said something."

"It's nothing."

"It's not nothing so tell me what it is."

"It sounds silly." Chakotay just sighed and waited. "Ok, ok. When I look at you, I should know how you feel from your expression. Just now, I felt like I should have known whether you were teasing or being serious and I couldn't tell. I'm supposed to be able to figure that out with you but I can't. It's not you or anything you've said or done. It's something in me that's not there anymore."

"Kathryn, look at me." Chakotay waited until her eyes met his. "It's still there because I can see it. You've been through a lot. It's just temporary. Will you trust me on this?"

Kathryn looked doubtful but nodded.

"Good. Let's get to sick bay and then up to the bridge."

Kathryn downloaded a novel to a padd and curled up on the couch in her ready room feeling slightly guilty at not working but much happier knowing she was near her bridge. About 10:00, Chakotay came in with B'Elanna and Seven.

"Hi, Kathryn. I thought you'd like some company for a while."

"Hello, B'Elanna. Seven." Kathryn eyed Chakotay warily. "Is this some sort of counseling session set up by the doctor?"

"Not according to the doctor. He wanted to see you on the holodeck and spend hours and hours delving into your thoughts. He settled for you three talking about events."

"How did Tuvok manage to escape this little tête-à-tête for three?"

"He convinced the doctor that Vulcan mediation techniques were a more appropriate treatment for him."

"Captain, I'm not too thrilled to be here either, but if it keeps the doc happy and gets us back on duty, I'm willing to go along with these sessions." B'Elanna's unwilling acceptance reminded Kathryn that she wasn't the only one being watched by the doctor.

"All right, Chakotay. Did the doctor say what we're supposed to discuss?"

"I have that information, Captain." Seven spoke up and took control of the conversation. "I have a series of questions and issues the doctor feels you should consider and discuss. He believes they will help you deal with having been assimilated and then removed from the collective. If you will please sit down, Lieutenant, we can begin."

Chakotay left the three women knowing that he had a few hours before Kathryn grew too restless to continue. At least she would welcome the escape lunch in the mess hall would offer.

Chakotay was correct – Kathryn was more than willing to join him in the mess hall when he returned to the ready room. He caught her up on the ship's status on the way to the turbolift. She spent the rest of their lunch trying to get more details on 'nothing new to report' out of him. Chakotay found himself describing the odd piece of rock they passed and a handful of very typical yellow stars plus a red giant that had come into sensor range.

After lunch, Chakotay suggested she rest in her quarters for a few hours. At first, Kathryn resisted but eventually realized that he was not going to yield. She gave in when he promised she could join him on the bridge for an hour before dinner. Chakotay walked her to her quarters and left her at the door. Kathryn entered her quarters and wandered around briefly before she went to the replicator and asked for a cup of coffee. She was more than a little surprised that a cup appeared at her request. She happily took the cup and a book and went to her couch to enjoy both. An hour later, she had some very unkind words for the replicator when it refused to give her another cup of coffee, stating that she had exceeded her allocation for the next three hours. She returned to her book but found it less than pleasurable. Eventually she went to her bedroom and lay down.

"Chakotay to Captain Janeway."

Kathryn woke quickly but was slightly disoriented. "Janeway here."

"Are you ready to join me on the bridge?"

"Yes.  How soon will you be here?"

"I'm not coming to get you. You know the way on your own."

"What about the alarm you told me about."

"I've advised the computer to allow you to leave and come directly to the bridge, that is unless you'd prefer me to send a security detail to pick you up."

"No. I can manage just fine. I'll be there in a few minutes. Janeway out."

Kathryn stepped just far enough from the turbolift to clear the sensor and allow the door to close. She glanced around knowing the bridge crew had heard her arrive despite their apparent unawareness of her presence. Ayala was at tactical and acting chief of security until Tuvok returned to duty. Tom was at the helm – one thing that was normal. Chakotay was in her chair – yet another sight that was familiar to Kathryn as she exited the turbolift. She knew Harry had been standing Gamma shift so was unsurprised to see Hayes at Ops. Kathryn looked around the bridge again as it struck her. Four of the six bridge crew were former Maquis.  They knew enough to take over the ship yet they followed her  –  she turned her gaze back to Chakotay – because he told them they should. He was the reason this crew was united. She knew in a moment he would stand and turn to greet her. He would hold out his arm as she went down the steps to the lower level of the bridge.

Kathryn jerked her thoughts back to the bridge and the present as Chakotay spoke.

"Come on in, Captain." His arm was out waiting for her.

"Thank you, Commander." Kathryn stepped forward and down the steps. She paused as she reached her chair before moving on to take the second one. Chakotay didn't comment on her choice but simply sat down next to her and started filling her in on the most recent events and status of the ship. Kathryn barely noticed the passage of time and was surprised when the Beta shift started entering the bridge.

"Captain, I've been relieved. It's time for dinner."

"Already?" Her confusion was brief but Kathryn quickly recovered. "Yes, of course. I wonder what Neelix has on the menu tonight."

That day set the pattern for the next few. On the fourth morning, Seven was late showing up for their morning discussion. It was the first opportunity for Kathryn and B'Elanna to talk together.

"Do you think this is helping you at all, B'Elanna?"

"It did – for about two days. But now, I don't think it's much help. Seven and the doctor have been focusing on how we are adjusting to being without the collective but I think I'm pretty well past that point."

"I agree. I don't feel that her topics are much use for me. She was in the collective much longer than we were so it makes sense that she would have had more trouble adjusting than we would." Kathryn hesitated before asking her next question. "Have you had any problems dealing with other people?"

"I don't understand. What kind of problems?"

"Well, knowing if you are reacting the way you should. It might sound silly but I can't tell whether someone is joking or serious when they say things in a regular conversation and sometimes I get the feeling that I should be reacting more strongly to comments."

"I know what you mean. Tom told a joke a few nights ago at dinner that must have been hilarious from Harry's reaction but I didn't find it at all humorous. When Tom started to explain why it was funny, I knew why; I just didn't think it was funny. Intellectually I knew it was one of his better jokes but I still didn't laugh."

"Has anything seemed to help you?"

"Tom has. He asked me later about why I hadn't laughed and I told him. He was really great and we talked about how I used to react to his jokes. He realized that he hadn't heard me laugh since we got back. That seemed to be a challenge or something so he started tickling me. At first, I didn't react but then I did just a bit. I tickled him back and he started laughing. Eventually I was laughing, too. It felt good. He tried the joke again and that time I found it vaguely funny. When I smiled a bit, he hugged me like we had achieved something wonderful.

"Now when it's just the two of us, he tells me if I should be angry or annoyed or happy to see him. Last night he showed up with a bunch of daisies for me and told me I was supposed to smile and hug him. He's helping me find my emotions again, or as Seven would phrase it – my humanity."

"I wonder if we can convince the doctor that we don't need to continue these sessions with Seven. We might do better on our own."

"It's worth a try. We can both mention it on our next check-in with him."

"You're lucky you have Tom to help you."

"I know. It's hard for both of us right now. I know I loved him and he loves me, but I'm having trouble finding that love again. He says he can see it in my eyes." Kathryn remembered trying to see things in Chakotay's eyes and allowed her mind to drift away from what B'Elanna was saying. B'Elanna stopped talking and watched Kathryn for a few moments. "You have someone who would help you if you just ask him."

"I can't ask him. We aren't like you and Tom."

"Are you sure about that?" With that last question, B'Elanna left a thoughtful Kathryn in the ready room.

That evening after dinner, Kathryn and Chakotay sat on the couch in her quarters talking and enjoying a cup of tea. Kathryn had yielded ungraciously to the coffee rationing imposed by the doctor and accepted herbal tea as a substitute.

"Well, I finally got the doctor to drop his requirement that I know exactly where you are, Kathryn. You're free to move about the ship with a few exceptions."

"Really? That's wonderful!" Kathryn's pleasure quickly turned to suspicion. "What exceptions?"

"You can't go to engineering, the bridge or crawl around any Jeffrey's tubes."

"But I've been on the bridge already. Why can't I go there?"

"You can, but you still need my consent." Chakotay's voice was patient. "I've been pretty reasonable so far, haven't I?"

"So far, yes. I got the doctor to change one of his requirements, too." She waited to watch Chakotay's response and was rewarded with a steady look of interest. "He said B'Elanna and I can discontinue our sessions with Seven."

"How did you manage that?"

"We just told him the truth – that we're past the point where she is helpful."

"Care to expand on that statement?"

"Well, B'Elanna summarized it best I think. Seven was helping us deal with leaving the collective.  Now we just need to regain the things we lost when we joined the collective."

"What sort of things?"

"Well, Seven would probably call it our humanity but I'd call it reconnecting with our emotions."

"You're not saying you've lost your emotions are you?"

"No. They're there but they are just out of my reach. I can remember feeling all sorts of things but I can't feel what I remember."

"Is it getting any better as the days pass?"

"Just a bit."

"Has B'Elanna found anything that is helping her?"

"Tom mostly. When it's just the two of them, he tells her how she should be feeling and reacting. He even tickled her to make her laugh one night."

"That sounds like Tom. She's lucky to have him."

"Very lucky."

"You sound like you have something more on your mind."

"I do. I spent the afternoon thinking about something else B'Elanna said this morning."

"Ready to talk about it yet?"

"Probably as ready as I'll ever be. Remember how I said I could remember how I felt? Well, I remember how I reacted to those feelings and the reasons for those reactions. I also remember how it felt when I was in the collective and those feelings were gone. There was a certain peace without all those emotions but it was an empty peace. I don't like that memory. I want to feel those emotions again and experience the turmoil that comes with them."

"You will, Kathryn, just give yourself some time. Did B'Elanna say something to make you think you wouldn't?"

"No, nothing like that. She had been telling me how Tom had been helping her work through all this and I told her she was lucky to have him. She told me I had someone too if I just asked. That got me thinking about that someone."

"Did you come to any conclusions?"

"A few but mostly I ended up with more questions."

Chakotay knew they were finally getting to whatever it was that was bothering Kathryn.

"Do you want to tell me about your questions. Maybe I can help you decide whether to ask for that help."

"No, I think I'd rather talk to you about us, or at least the us I remember."

To say Kathryn's statement was unexpected would have been an understatement. Chakotay's surprise kept him quiet.

"At least if that's all right with you, Chakotay." Her voice sounded almost frightened.

"Of course. Whatever you want to talk about is fine. I was just surprised you wanted to talk about us since you always avoided it in the past."

"I know. I told you I can remember everything I felt and the reasons for my decisions about those feelings. I'm just not sure where to start." Kathryn mentally sorted out the things she wanted to tell Chakotay. She didn't realize how long she had sat lost in her thoughts until he shifted position. "I guess the most important thing is that I love you, or I did just before I left on this last mission. I never said it and never wanted to hear it from you.

"You never pushed me for more than I was comfortable giving and I know that I might have waited too long. The only reason I'm telling you this now is I remember the look we exchanged before I left to confront the Borg and the feel of your hand as you held mine. For one brief moment, it was just the two of us and the rest of the universe was nothing. That's what I remember and it's what I want to feel again. If you still love me, I'd like you to help me the way Tom is helping B'Elanna. I'd like you to help me regain my humanity – and that one brief moment. I want you to help me love you again."

"Kathryn, I'm not sure where to start." Chakotay's thoughts were a jumbled mass of new hopes for a future with Kathryn, dashed dreams of past disappointments, and his responsibilities while Kathryn recovered from her experience with the Borg. "First of all, I love you and I will help you any way I can. You know you haven't completely adjusted and I have to keep in mind that you could change your mind again. You've always interpreted Starfleet regs as prohibiting you from any involvement with me or any other member of your crew. Don't you think it's possible you could change your mind?"

"Of course it's possible; that's what I've been thinking about all day. I honestly cannot see how the regs can mean I can't be with the man I love. I've thought about that and I know the logic that comes to that conclusion but it just seems false. I really don't think I'll change my mind."

"I'm not going to do anything to move our relationship forward too fast. Will you trust me on that part?"

"I trust you. I was so afraid."

"Afraid?"

"Yes. I was afraid that you didn't love me anymore, that you wouldn't help me, that you wouldn't believe me. There were so many reasons and ways for you to say no."

Chakotay pulled Kathryn close in a hug. "I've never yet figured out how to tell you 'no'.  At this rate, I doubt I ever will."

Six months after returning to duty, Kathryn returned to the bridge after making an impromptu inspection of Voyager after lunch. Chakotay stood as she entered but she made a beeline for her ready room.

"Commander, in my ready room!" Her voice was authoritative but did not sound angry. Chakotay was puzzled. Everything on her inspection tour should have been fine. He turned the bridge over to Harry and followed Kathryn.

"You wanted to see me, Captain." His rote phrasing brought a smirk to Kathryn's face.

"I'll see you later, Commander. Right now, I just want to update you on a few things. Sit down." Kathryn motioned him to the couch and turned to the replicator. "Would you care for some tea while we talk?"

"Please."

Kathryn quickly retrieved two cups from the replicator and joined Chakotay on the couch.

"Remember that discussion we had while I was recuperating from being assimilated and what I thought about protocol?" Chakotay nodded. "Well, I've finally put together all my feelings and opinions about protocol and I understand and agree with my former conclusions."

Kathryn calmly picked up her tea and took a sip. Chakotay froze and nearly spilled his tea in his lap as her words sank in.

"I should probably tell you that I've changed my mind about my former conclusions."  Kathryn sat her tea down and leaned over to brush his cheek with her lips. "I like things the way they are."

Chakotay relaxed and managed to put his cup on the table.

"Which is not to say they aren't going to change."

Chakotay sighed. Kathryn was enjoying herself at his expense.

"Kathryn, what exactly are you getting at?"

"I thought maybe you'd like to officially move into my quarters with me."

Chakotay wasn't jumping to any conclusions. She had been reversing her statements during the entire conversation and she probably would again. He waited for a reversal.

"Well? Would you?"

"Would I like to officially move in with you? You already know I would so why are you asking?"

"Just making it official. It's not something I can order you to do."

"I'll have the paperwork finished by the end of shift and ready for your approval. Was there anything else?"

"Don't you want to know why?"

"I don't think so, no."

"Well, you're going to find out so don't be in such a hurry to escape."

"I wouldn't exactly call agreeing to move in with you 'escaping'. It's more like a lifetime sentence."

"Then why did you want to leave?"

"You're enjoying this conversation entirely too much at the moment and it's all at my expense."

"I'm sorry." Kathryn's voice was sincere. "I'm just happy and you're such fun to tease on duty."

"Well, can we save the teasing for later?"

"If I promise to stop teasing, will you stay so I can finish what I want to tell you?"

"You're the captain. Your wish is quite literally my command."

"And don't you ever forget it!" Kathryn slid closer to Chakotay and leaned on his shoulder. "You didn't comment on my herbal tea."

"Ok, I'll comment. Why tea and not coffee?"

"I'm back on a caffeine restriction again. I thought maybe having you around all the time would make it easier for both of us. Besides you're partially responsible."

"Don't blame me for all the coffee you drink."

"I'm not." Kathryn just sat and enjoyed being with Chakotay. She eyed the chronometer without moving – only an hour before Beta shift began. Maybe they could just sit here until then. Chakotay shifted and brought Kathryn out of her reverie.

"Chakotay? Did you enjoy being captain while I was with the Borg?"

"I'm not sure enjoy is the right word. I hated the reason I was acting captain and was worried that we wouldn't get you back. Once you were safe, I'm not sure I felt like I was the captain. It was more like you were just off duty."

"Well, then my next bit of news might not be good news."

"Should I start worrying again?"

"No, but you probably will anyway. You're going to have to take over as captain again in about seven months."

Chakotay leaned away a bit and turned to face Kathryn trying to think of more than one explanation.

"Are you sick?"

Kathryn shook her head.

"You're not teasing?"

Kathryn shook her head.

"No games?"

Kathryn shook her head.

"You're sure?"  Kathryn nodded.

A grin slowly spread across Chakotay's face before he pulled her close in a hug. Just before his lips reached hers, Kathryn spoke.

"Thank you for helping me relive that one brief moment every day, Chakotay."