by Dakota

Kathryn woke up and started to stretch only to jerk her eyes wide open when she encountered a warm body.

There was an arm draped across her waist and a leg across one ankle. She was pressed securely against the length of the body, a naked and definitely male body.

Slowly Kathryn turned her head toward the face that went with the arm and foot. The face was turned away from her and buried in his pillow but she would know that hairline anywhere. Further inspection confirmed she was indeed in Chakotay's bed.

Slowly the memories of the previous evening returned and she sighed in contentment. Kathryn tried to stretch again this time allowing for the arm and foot. Lazy muscles ached but Kathryn smiled as she remembered the evening before.

The crew had been working around the clock for over two weeks repairing the damage to Voyager caused by the Kazon before rechecking every system and relay to make sure there was no lingering trace of the Kazon takeover who had poorly understood several systems and made changes that over time could be dangerous. Repairs had finally progressed sufficiently for most of the crew to return to their normal schedules, and Kathryn and Chakotay could turn their attention back to administrative issues. Yesterday they had both worked well past the end of Alpha Shift.

About 20:00, Kathryn had allowed Chakotay to talk her into dinner in the mess hall. They took their trays to their usual table and chatted about the crew and progress made in repairs. They decided to go over the afternoon's progress reports in his quarters rather than return to the ready room. They passed Tom as they were leaving the mess hall.

"Hi, Captain." Tom nodded to Kathryn. "Taking Chakotay's mind off the girl he left behind on Hanon IV?"

Chakotay didn't respond but his expression had amused Kathryn. They entered the turbolift.

"Another girl you've had to leave behind. Shall we go back for her?"

Chakotay remained silent and tried to focus on the door. Kathryn studied his face and tried again.

"She was a bit young for you, wasn't she?"

Chakotay ignored her. The door opened and they stepped off.

"Funny, she didn't seem to be your type. I would have guessed blondes."

Chakotay stopped at his door and stood aside for her to enter first. Once inside, he turned to face her.

"What's this all about, Kathryn? Don't tell me you're jealous."

"Of course not!" Kathryn denied the emotion vehemently. "I could make you forget her in a second if I wanted."

"Really?" Chakotay sounded even more skeptical than he looked. "Prove it!"

It was a challenge and Kathryn had never been one to turn down a challenge. Kathryn didn't consider the ramifications of her next words.

"Prove it?" Kathryn's voice sounded like she thought he was irrational.

"Yes, prove it." Chakotay's voice was defiant, daring her to act.

Kathryn didn't think.

She kissed him. She grabbed his uniform and kissed him.

Not a light butterfly kiss to end a joke. No, nothing that friendly and innocent. It was a real kiss. A passionate kiss of possession. She pressed her body against his and wrapped her arms around his neck.

By the time Kathryn had recovered from her surprise at her action and unexpected reaction to the kiss, Chakotay had also recovered and was pulling her closer. At some point, Kathryn vaguely remembered Chakotay had managed to pull away and step back from her, asking with his eyes what she wanted. She made her choice and stepped back into his arms.

Kathryn sighed softly as she remembered the rest of the evening.

Chakotay shifted and his arm moved slightly. Then a change in his breathing told Kathryn he was awake. Kathryn looked towards him again and this time she looked into dark eyes. When she didn't move away, he smiled at her and turned on his side so he could look at her all the while keeping his arm over her.

"You don't do anything halfway, do you?"

Kathryn shook her head. "If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right." She chuckled as one hand lightly rubbed the arm across her body. "We did get it right, didn't we?"

"Oh, yes. We definitely got it right." Chakotay leaned in to kiss her slowly and gently with a hint of passion.

"Regrets?" His voice was soft.

"Not a one." Kathryn's voice was nearly as soft as she smiled back at him.

"I didn't plan to…"

"I know." Kathryn cut off Chakotay before he could finish. "Believe me, I was as surprised as you were last night."

"I'm just as surprised this morning."

"Because I'm still here?"

Chakotay shook his head. "That I'm not having to hold you down to keep you off the bridge."

Kathryn just chuckled. "I'll leave if you want me to."

"No." Chakotay tightened his arm as he spoke. "I don't want you to leave."

"Good. I want to enjoy this while I can." 

"While you can?"

"I have to be on duty in an hour or two and so do you." Kathryn suddenly realized what Chakotay meant. "Oh, you thought I meant this was a one time encounter, didn't you?"

Chakotay nodded. Kathryn shifted slightly on her side so she could look at him more easily. Her fingers traced his tattoo. "Forget that, mister. You're stuck with me now but I will admit there are a lot of reasons why it should be."

"Any of them have to do with recent events?"

"No, not the events but your reaction to everything that has happened in the last few months." Kathryn was trying to be open about her feelings. It wasn't easy. She had become far too accustomed to hiding behind her position on the ship.

"Several people you called friends betrayed us and left us stranded. I can't help wondering how much your reaction last night had to do with Seska."

"Well, you can stop wondering. That reaction was entirely yours." Chakotay smiled but his tone was serious. "Is my history in the Maquis a factor?"

"Of course it's a factor. It's part of who you are which means it's part of why I love you, but it's not a reason why we should end whatever this is practically before it gets started. At least not directly."

"So you love me?"

"If you have to ask then maybe I should leave."

Kathryn started to sit up but Chakotay held her down. "No, I'm sorry. This is all so new and unexpected. I'm not handling this well. I know you wouldn't have stayed last night if you didn't love me."

Kathryn relaxed and allowed him to pull her closer. "My reaction last night was all yours." She moved closer and kissed him. This kiss was not one of passion but of trust and love, a kiss that gave everything but did not ask for anything. When it ended, they didn't move apart immediately.

"Let me ask you a question." Kathryn finally broke the silence. "What happens if months or years from now one of us wants to end this relationship and the other doesn't? Could we really keep that off the bridge?"

Chakotay was silent as he thought about the question. "I don't know, Kathryn. I honestly don't know. You will put this ship and crew ahead of your personal life. My commitment to the crew is just as strong though I honestly can't say that I feel as compelled to get back to the Alpha Quadrant.

"We're both fairly private people when it comes to our personal lives. I don't think we'd be very likely to make any personal disagreements public."

"Could we avoid it?" Kathryn's voice was truly questioning. "We're human; we're going to fight. Could we really keep personal problems just between the two of us? This crew is finally finding a balance but could something like that between us split the crew, make them take sides?"

"We're going to fight no matter what we do. As for the crew taking sides, I suppose that could happen but it could just as easily happen if we disagree about a command decision. And there's no reason to think that the split would be along Maquis/Starfleet lines. It could just as easily be by some other criteria like enlisted personnel vs. officers or male vs. female."

"Yes, or more likely they'd all side with you." 

"Why do you say that?"

"Well, the men would stick with you and the women would think I was crazy for letting you do anything with that mouth other than kiss me. I could never convince them those dimples were wrong."

Chakotay laughed. "The men would never side with me. Most of them think you're wonderful and beautiful. Then there are those pips." His hand traced up her side and across her chest suggestively.

Kathryn laughed and pushed his hand back to her waist. "Stop that! You're supposed to be explaining why being together won't cause problems, not giving me a hands on demonstration of the benefits."

"Ending this now could be just as much of a problem, if not more."

"I suppose that's true. I wish I knew for certain." Kathryn sighed. 

"We can discuss this for hours and not come to any rational conclusion. This isn't a logical decision; it's an emotional one. Maybe it's not a good idea, but I want to explore this relationship further. Do you?"

"Yes," Kathryn brushed his cheek with her hand. "But I'm scared."

"Of how it will affect the crew?"

"No. I'm afraid of how it will affect me." Kathryn looked into his eyes. "You said it earlier – I don't do anything halfway."

"I don't think I understand."

"I'm engaged, remember? Or at least I was." Kathryn flushed as she remembered that little detail for the first time. "After last night, I know that even if we got home tomorrow, I'd have to break it off with Mark. I've never had to worry about my feelings interfering with my duty before."

"And now you do?"

Kathryn nodded her response to Chakotay's question.

"Personally I’m glad about that, very glad. I like the idea that I'm a distraction. Professionally I think it will make you a better officer by providing some emotional balance to your life."

Kathryn still looked skeptical.

"We don't have to choose between a relationship and being in command. We can be together and still be the officers this ship needs. I believe we'll be stronger and better officers together."

"How do you suggest we make this work?"

"We deal with any problems as they arise. We learn from any mistakes we make. We just make sure we get it right."

"If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right." She chuckled. "We do want to get it right, don't we?"

"Oh, yes. We definitely want to get it right." Chakotay leaned forward to kiss Kathryn. His kiss was as slow and gentle as earlier but this time the mood changed and Kathryn pulled him closer.

"The time is 06:00."

Kathryn roused from a light sleep as the computer sounded Chakotay's alarm.  She pushed herself up slightly to kiss him as he opened his eyes. "I'll see you in the mess hall in thirty minutes."

"I didn't get to kiss you good morning."

Chakotay tried to pull her back down but she wriggled out of his grasp laughing at him from across the bed. "Yes, you did."

Chakotay sighed in mock sorrow making Kathryn laugh again. She thought a moment then made her decision as she pulled on her slacks and jacket. "You said I never do anything halfway, right? Well, if you're in the mess hall with my breakfast waiting for me, maybe I'll kiss you good morning when I join you."

"Is that a promise?"

Kathryn grabbed up the rest of her clothes and boots and headed for the door. "There's only one way you're going to find out."

Chakotay was on his second cup of coffee when Kathryn finally entered the mess hall a good twenty minutes late. She walked over to the table and stood next to him. "Good morning."

Chakotay stood and looked down at Kathryn. He saw the spark of mischief in her eyes and knew she had been serious. His dimples appeared as he tugged on his ear and let his eyes drop to the floor before slowly making their way up her body until they finally returned to her eyes.

"Did you want something, Captain?"

"Yes, I did, Commander."

Kathryn moved closer to him. She didn't just move halfway; she invaded his personal space with a vengeance. Her arms closed around his neck as she pulled his head down to kiss him. He forced his arms to remain at his side making it clear who was kissing whom.

At some level, Chakotay heard the silence that had descended over the mess hall and knew that every eye in the room was watching them. As the kiss ended and Kathryn started to step back, he pulled her back into his arms and kissed her again.

Chakotay only ended the kiss when he felt his self-control slipping. He stepped away from Kathryn and dropped his hands.

"What was it you wanted, Captain?"

"That will do for now, Commander." Kathryn's saucy grin was for him alone. "Now, where is my coffee?"

Chakotay smiled as he went to get them both fresh coffee. She certainly didn't do anything halfway.

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